Smoked Turkey

Smoked Turkey

1 14-17lb. Turkey fresh or fully thawed frozen
2 gallons hot water 120-140°F ( or ½ gallon boiling water and 1 ½ gallon ice water)
2 cups Morton Tender-Quick
¾ cup Pickling salt
1 4oz. Bottle of liquid smoke

Decide where you want this to sit for at least eight hours because you will not be able to move it while it's full. Mix all ingredients (except turkey) in a large nonmetal (4-5 gallon plastic, glass or ceramic) container.( or mix edry ingredients with the boiling water to dissolve then add ice water and liquid smoke.) Place turkey in solution. Weigh down turkey with an upside-down plate and a full glass jar or bottle to keep it covered with the solution. Let sit overnight or up to twenty-four hours. Preheat oven to 350°F. Remove turkey, rinse well and pat dry*. Place breast down in a large roasting pan using a roasting bag according to manufacturers directions if desired. Bake at 350°F for one hour. Reduce heat to 250°F and continue baking until and a thermometer stabbed in the thigh reads 180°F. (about 1 ½ -2 hours more)

* At this point the turkey can be sprinkled or rubbed with any desired herbs and spices. I use:
2 tsp dry mustard
2tsp garlic powder
1tsp onion powder
¼ tsp tumeric
1tsp paprika
1tbsp siracha hot sauce
2tbsp Bourbon (like Jim Beam)

To use for smoked chicken (and other smaller meats), use the following amounts and a 4-5 quart container (like an ice cream bucket). Refrigerate at least four hours or overnight. Reduce heat after thirty minutes and cook twenty minutes to one hour twenty more.

¼ cup pickling salt
2/3 cup Tender-Quick
2tbsp liquid smoke
10 2/3 cups water
4-6 lb. Chicken

2tbsp pickling salt
1/3 cup Tender-Quick
1tbsp liquid smoke
5 1/3 cups water
1/2-3 lb. Cornish game hens

1tbsp pickling salt
2tbsp 2tsp Tender-Quick
1 ½ tsp liquid smoke
2 2/3 cups water
up to 1 ½ lb. meat (like pork chops or chicken pieces)

Pirate Buttermilk Banana Bread

In this previous post I made Mom's banana bread. Now I'll make mine.

Pirate Buttermilk Banana Bread

¾ cup sugar
½ cup real butter [I use Land O'Lakes]
2 eggs
2 large or 3 medium very ripe [we call them "giraffe-skin"]bananas to equal 1 cup mashed [I never measure them]
2 ½ cups flour
1 tsp. Baking soda
1 tsp. Baking powder
¾ cup buttermilk

1 shot (1oz./2tbsp.) secret Syn-ister ingredient spiced rum [Aye Captain Morgan]
½ cup plus broken English walnuts (optional)[it doesn't really need them]

Preheat oven to 350° F.

Sift together flour, baking soda, and baking powder. Set aside.
Cream together butter and sugar.

Add eggs, then bananas.
Add flour mixture a little at a time, then add milk [be careful, it splatters] and the rum [yo-ho-ho and a bottle of...]. Stir in nuts (if using) with a spoon. Pour into a greased loaf pan and Bake 1 hour.
Makes 1 standard sized loaf.

Now, try to share withe the rest of your crew, I know it's hard to stop eating it.

Banana Bread

This is the original recipe as it appears in Mom's Recipe box:

And this is what I translated it to:

Banana Bread
¾ cup sugar
½ cup shortening
2 eggs
2 large or 3 medium bananas
⅔ cup milk


2 ½ cups flour
1 tsp. Baking soda
1 tsp. Baking powder

350° F

Sift together flour, baking soda, and baking powder. Set aside. Cream together shortening and sugar. Add eggs, then bananas. Add flour mixture. Add milk. Pour in loaf pan Bake 1 hour.

But I can do better and Mom insists it calls for nuts, but I don't see them. Do you? So here's the edited version (with notes):

Banana Bread

¾ cup sugar
½ cup shortening [Mom insists on butter flavored Crisco® ]
2 eggs
2 large or 3 medium very ripe [we call them "giraffe-skin"] bananas to equal 1 cup mashed

2 ½ cups flour
1 tsp. Baking soda
1 tsp. Baking powder

⅔ cup milk
½ cup plus broken English walnuts (optional) [because Mom insists they're in there]

Preheat oven to 350° F.
Sift together flour, baking soda, and baking powder. Set aside.
Cream together shortening and sugar. Add eggs, then bananas.
Add flour mixture a little at a time, then add milk [be careful, it splatters]. Stir in nuts (if using) with a spoon. Pour in loaf pan and Bake 1 hour.Makes 1 standard sized loaf.

I am a Ditz

I am a tired, distracted, ditz. I have things I want to tell you all but I never seem to remember to post them so I'm going to try very hard to make at least one post a week from now on. First of all I'm going to be posting transcriptions of (and corrections to) family recipes. Some of these I will also post an "improved" or "updated" version if I come up with one. I will tag these as "heirloom" food and "newloom food". "Pirate" in a recipe name will mean it contains alcohol, usually rum, as will "drunken" and sometimes "Irish". I will also attempt to label recipes with allergy info for my sensitive friends.